Address in the Stars
by DegrasssiIlove
Summary: If the closest person in your life was gone, you had nothing left, and felt the hole in your heart grow more by each day, what would you do?  Write letters to the stars that could never be read?
1. Chapter 1

**Ok, I am going to be honest here, this story is very depressing… It is basically going to be the memories of Clare and Eli and how she is now. I encourage you to read because I was inspired by this and when I am inspired, my work is really good (If I may say so myself.) This WILL be a 3 shot I believe sense the song only has three versus and I don't feel like repeating the song… I will add a happier story or one shot though sometime soon so you don't get upset with me. Well enjoy beautifuls! **

_Stumbled across your picture today  
I could barely breath  
The moment stopped me cold,  
Grabbed me like a thief.  
I dialed your number, but you wouldn't be there  
I knew the whole time, but it's still not fair  
I just wanted to hear your voice,  
I just needed to hear your voice._

I know I had to do it sometime… I had become stronger over the years and now it was time.

I pulled out an old box hidden under our- my bed… There had not been a day pass by that I haven't thought about him. I cried every time he came back into my memories…

I opened up the dirty cardboard box and looked inside.. There they were. Every picture ever token of me with Eli. I picked up a stack and determined the picture. I was at a picnic table with a white puffy cloud shaped like a heart in the background…

"_Eli!" I giggled, "S-stop it!" _

_We were casually sitting in a quiet picnic area and all of the sudden Eli decided to get evil and attacked me on to the fresh green grass. He tickled me until I thought I was going to be sick and finally pulled me close to his side laying on the grass. _

_We looked up and saw white puffy clouds all over the sky. I noticed one in particular that was shaped like a heart. I pointed to eat and giggled and Eli looked up to see what I was being so girly about. He chuckled and leaned in to kiss my cheek. _

_I then took my camera out and wiggled my eyebrows at Eli. He rolled his eyes at me but agreed. He put his arms around my shoulders while I took a picture with one of my hands. I looked at it when I was finished and smiled when I saw the milky cloud right above us._

I remembered it perfectly… Eli's lips against my forehead and his whispers of sweet nothings in my ears. And now it was all gone. I didn't notice until my mind came back to reality that I had dropped the picture and was sobbing uncontrollably.

I ran to the phone and dialed the number that I knew so well… It rang for what felt like hours, and every time it did, my heart beat grew louder. I knew he wouldn't answer. It was impossible. I needed to hear his voice… I just needed to…

Finally the voicemail came on and I was waiting to hear his voice on the other line saying, "Sorry I missed your call, leave me a message and I will get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks."

But no… It was to late.

"The number you are trying to reach does no longer exist-" I screamed into the phone and through it across the room. I sobbed uncontrollably and ran over to my box of empty paper and envelopes and picked up one of each and threw it on the table and started writing.

I felt my tears come down onto the paper as I wrote the words. Black ink mixing with my salty tears where ruining it, but I didn't care.

I wrote how much I hated him for leaving me here alone and didn't even say 'I love you' before he left. I also wrote that I was dying without him.

I grabbed the letter and threw it in the envelope and sealed it. I ran outside into the pouring rain and jammed it into my mailbox. As I came back inside, I realized that he wasn't going to write me back, he wasn't going to call me back, he wasn't ever going to come back at all, he was gone. Forever. And I couldn't except it.

I screamed for hours it seemed until my throat was dry from it and my eyes were bloodshot red. I fell to the floor holding my face in my hands and sobbed, feeling the ache in my heart.

I sat their for awhile, unable to move until finally crawling to my room not bothering getting on the bed, and cried on the hardwood floor until sleep got the best of me.

What do I do with all I need to say!  
So much I wanna tell you everyday  
Oh it breaks my heart,  
I cry these tears in the dark.  
I write these letters to you,  
But they get lost in the blue,  
'Cause there's no address in the stars.

**Are you crying? I hope not. This was really sad to write, but I do promise that when I am finished with this story, it is going to be a happy ending… Kinda… You can't have a really happy ending when your love one is dead, but there are ways to make it happy. Review :D!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I haven't got any feedback on this story but I am not giving up just yet. Please tell me how this is, or I most likely won't continue to the next and last chapter (which will be the best one) so please give me some feedback… Enjoy!**

_Now I'm driving_

_Through the pitch black dark_

_I'm screaming at the sky_

_Oh cause it hurts so bad_

_Everybody tells me_

_Oh all I need is time_

_Then the morning rolls in_

_And it hits me again_

_And that isn't nothing' but a lie._

I woke up in the morning, not remembering anything. All I knew was that I loved Eli.

"Good morning, baby," I said smiling, waiting for a reply that wasn't coming, "Eli, you ok?"

I then looked down at myself. I was on the floor and my eyes were stinging. I touched my face and then realized I must have been crying.

Scared, I looked up at our bed and it was empty...

BAM!

It hit me.

BAM!

Eli was dead.

BAM!

He died in a car accident.

BAM!

I was alone... Forever...

I felt the tears come to my bloodshot eyes again and used all my strength to stand up. I looked out of my window and it was in fact, not morning. It was in fact, very dark outside.

I started walking weakly to my bathroom until I heard the house phone ring. I ran up to it, knowing it was Eli. It had to be. He told me he would never leave me, he promised! He said he would always love me! It had to be him!

"Eli, baby, is that you?" I said into the phone, waiting for his voice to emerge from the other line.

"Clare, honey, it's me." My mother said. "I didn't think you would be up. It's 2 a.m. I wanted to see how you were. I couldn't sleep and I thought it was my couscous telling me I needed to talk to you." She laughed, trying to lighten the mood. It didn't help though.

I was crying again. I looked at the phone in my hands and brought it back up to my ear.

"Mommy," I chocked, "I miss you so much. H-he's g-gone! I'm a-alone! He left me mom! I haven't slept in months! I'm loosing my sanity!"

That was a lie though; I had lost my sanity along time ago... I sobbed while my mother tried to soothe me from the other line.

"Sweetie, you just need some time... He's gone and you have to except that.". She was crying, I could hear it in her voice.

I was angry now. I didn't need time! I needed Eli! Now!

"That's nothing but a lie!" I screamed into the phone and slammed it down.

I stared at my hand on the table. The ring... The sparkly diamond ring...

And just like that, memories flooded back like a slap in the face.

_We were outside on top of Morty, staring at the brilliant stars. Our legs were intertwined, along with our arms._

_"I love you Eli." I sighed. He looked over into my eyes and smirked._

_"See the stars?" he asked, and I nodded confused, "Sometimes, I come out here and give every star I see a reason why I love you.." He then sat up pulled me up with him._

_He was nervous, I could tell. He grabbed my left hand to his lips and kissed my engagement finger which use to hold my purity ring. I had taken that off 7 months ago when I was finally ready._

_He suddenly jump off the car, followed by me and bent down on one knee. I gasped_

_"Clare Diane Edwards," He began trembling, "Will you do the honor in being my wife?" He pulled out a huge diamond ring and looked into my eyes._

_I screamed in joy and yelled yes a million times while he placed the ring on my finger._

_"Forever. I will never leave you baby, I love you.". He kissed my lips softly while holding my waist._

I ignored the phone while it kept ringing and ran to the blank paper and envelopes. I sat down on the table and begin to write.

_Dear Eli,_

_Remember when you said you would never leave me? You kissed me and you promiced. You said forever... Did you mean it?_

_You left. And now everyday I feel the empty hole in my heart that you left. I thought you loved me! Why did you leave? Why don't you visit it me in my dreams? Why do I never feel your presence? All I want is to hear your voice against my ears and your arms around my waist. Why can't you do that?_

_I love you Eli, I always will._

_Sincerely,_

_Blue eyes._

I put the letter in the envelope and ran to my car. I got in and rammed down the driveway and to the post office.

Once I got there I put a box along with the letter in the box. This had become a habit of mine to write letters to him and once in awhile send him a picture of him and I.

As I put in the box, I remembered how I would usually cry when I did this. I was out of tears.

This time I left without crying or saying a word. I got back into my car and screamed with all of my might... I was insane

As I drove off, it was 5 a.m. now and I was going to the grave yard.

As I pulled up, I got out and walked slowly to his grave. When I reached it, I fell down and sobbed, even though no tears came out, and hugged the stone. I wiped off the snow that was on it to read what it said.

Elijah Goldsworthy

1993-2016

I began to cry until suddenly I felt I wasn't alone. But this time I knew it was him…

What do I do with all I need to say

So much I wanna tell you everyday

_Oh it breaks my heart,_

_I cry these tears in the dark_

_I write these letters to you,_

_But they get lost in the blue,_

_'Cause there's no address in the stars._

**Ahh! Cliffhanger. What's gonna happen? The next chapter will be very good, but I sadly will not be posting it unless I at least get 2 reviews on this story. I don't want to continue it if people do not think it is good. So, as soon as I get 2 reviews, I will start typing it up and editing it, and it should be posted soon after. I don't take long to update. :) Please review if you want more.. Thank you beautifuls! **


	3. Chapter 3

**I am so glad I got feedback because I really wanted to continue this story! Thank you guys! Enjoy**

_Without you here with me,_

_I don't know what to do._

_I'd give anything_

_Just to talk to you_

I stood up suddenly, but did not dare turn around. I felt his warm breathe on my neck and arms wrap around my waist.

I cried out, not sad tears but happy tears. I felt his whisper in my ear and I almost fell over.

"Baby, why are you crying?" he sounded just the way I remembered.

Was I hallucinating? Have I finally went over the edge and was now thinking he was actually here? I didn't know until I felt the arms squeeze my waist tighter against his chest.

I turned around and threw my arms around him and cried into his shoulders.

"Eli?" I whispered in disbelief. I looked into his eyes and saw beautiful green orbs melt into my blue ones.

"Im here." he whispered back rubbing circles on my back.

I didn't know what to say, the love of my life was dead, and yet he was in my arms right now. I didn't care how crazy and unbelievable it was- Hell, I didn't even care if I was hallucinating! I heard his voice and he was holding me, that's more than I could ever ask for.

"I don't like when you cry." he wiped a few tears that had carelessly fell on my face, "You haven't stopped sense I died. I want you to smile and I want you to know that what I said before was true.

"I always loved you baby, I will never stop. Even if I am not in this world anymore, that is not going to stop me from loving you. I never left you either! I've always been here and I always will!" he kissed my forehead and then murmured against my lips, "You will be with me again one day."

I smiled for the first time sense he died and hugged him tighter.

"I have something for you," He reached into his pant pocket and pulled out a white letter then gently placed it in my hand. "When you start to miss me, read this and remember I will always be here." He kissed my lips and I suddenly melted into it.

Everything started to come back to me and I kissed him harder, never wanting to let go. But when I needed oxygen, I pulled apart and he looked into my eyes, searching for something.

"I love you too," I sobbed out, "Eli, say you love me again." I needed to hear it; I needed his lips to speak words of love.

"I love you, Clare," He started and pecked my lips one last time, "Now wake up."

Suddenly I only saw black and stirred in my spot. I opened my eyes and looked at my surroundings.

I was on the snowy ground with Eli's grave right next to me.

I remembered what had happened and wondered if it was only a dream. But when I felt my lips and realized I was smiling and that they were warm, I knew he had come.

The letter! I instantly looked down and found the letter four inches away from me.

I grabbed it and read it...

Dear blue eyes,

I love you so much. I always have. Whenever you need me, know that I am always here. It may not seem like it, but I am.

Please stop crying and smile more. I hate watching my beautiful angel break. You're amazing, you know that? And if I were their right now, you would be in my arms and married.

I am so sorry we never got the chance to get married. But I know that when you get here, and you will, we will be together for eternity. Nobody will end that.

I love you,

Eli

I smiled down at the note and felt the presence again and I smirked knowing every word he said was true.

I got up and left back to my house and I went straight to my room. Curling up on Eli's side of the bed and fell asleep with a smile on my face.

**So how was it? Pretty good? I thought it was a kinda happy ending? So my next stories are going to be happier and less like this. I hear one of you wants Eli's POV in this? I might do that in a side story if you want? :) Review! **


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